a curious glance

(little bit of what I see)

Category: Women

No Means A No: Inspired From Movie PINK

“No means a No. No is not a mere word but a statement in itself. It does not matter whether it comes from a friend, girlfriend, sex worker or even your wife. If she says a No, it has no other connotation than a NO.” This is the closing argument given by Amitabh Bachchan, who plays the role of a lawyer in the movie PINK. This post is not a review of the movie but a further advocacy of a strong message rendered in the movie. Now, it was about time that a movie was made on such a strong subject. Why the hell does our society objectify women?

It is so disturbing that a girl’s character is judged based on the clothes she wears. She may wear a dress or a short skirt, party with her male friends and even enjoy a few drinks. How does that portray that she is keen to be physically involved with another man? How on earth does that mean she is okay to have sex with anyone and everyone? If you are someone who thinks she is too liberal and would not be a virgin and thus be available, think again, you moron. Think a hundred times again. The movie rightly propagates that even if a woman has had sexual relationship with someone else, it was her choice, she still has a right to say No to you! She does not feel for you and does not want it with you. It is not that complicated, is it? However, our patriarchal society would continue to judge women and demean them on such grounds.

The movie further mocks the society and discusses the rules that decide the character of a woman. She should not go out in the night; she should not smile and talk to a man; she should definitely not wear short clothes and drink alcohol. All these give men the right to pass derogatory remarks on women. Now, what confuses me is how can these be considered hints to establish sexual relationships? I find this confounding to the core and I will tell you why. A liberal woman of today would not need to display hints in such lame ways. If she were interested in a man, she would have the guts to voice it! So until it has her consent, do not put the filthy mind to work, you coward. In simple words:

No, because it’s her choice
No, because she has a voice
No, because it’s her liberty
No, because she is just friendly
No, because she doesn’t like
No, because she has the right
No, because it’s her own body
No, because you are NObody

I also understand that such movies and blogs like mine would not bring about a sudden change in the mindset of the society. But it’s worth a try. The issue is deep rooted and it would take many many years for the transformation. Maybe every mother can teach their sons from a young age the significance of a girl’s No. However, until every man starts to respect the woman and her right to liberty, it saddens me to say, our safety is in our own hands. We have to be careful of the time, place and our company.

PS: A brilliant movie and Amitabh Bachchan proved yet again why is he the greatest actor of all times…

Nation Without Feminism?

Sakshi and Sindhu win medals at Olympics; yes, they make us proud; India India is the chant all around… Amongst all this celebration, what disturbed me was the tinge of sexism added to the glory. Social media was pervaded with comments and posts like “Indian Women bring us the glory”, “See, Women did it for India” and “Indian Women make history”. Now, let us understand that these posts in no way meant to demean the Indian men. However, inequality and exploitation of women is so prevalent in our country, that feminism gets promoted at every possible platform. Why was I disturbed? Because, I hope for a nation where there would be no need to cry aloud the word “feminism” persistently. Where “Indian athletes bring glory to the nation” would be the posts irrespective of whether women or men bring us the medals. I hope for a nation where the need to advocate feminism is no more required.

I guess my idea of such a nation is far from reality as of now. Although the contemporary urbane men admire and recognise what a woman is capable of, the overall situation in India and some other parts of the world is reprehensible. Well, some people think, the concept of feminism is misused and the women are trying to overpower men and want to rise and shine above them. I do not think the raging battle is to compete with men; it is in fact to let us be, for us to be born, for us to be accepted, for us to be respected, for us to be free, for us to be equal…The fight for feminism would continue as long as the following ideology/practice exists:

  • Female fetuses are killed
  • Parents consider son as old age support
  • Parents spend more on son’s education
  • Restrictions on girls in the name of security
  • Man expects his would-be wife to be a virgin
  • Girl’s family sponsors the wedding ceremony
  • Dowry and Domestic Violence
  • Man is the bread earner
  • Woman is the family care taker
  • Women should know how to cook
  • Use of words like slut, whore and mother/sister fu_ _er

Yes, the list is long… Until the time women get their due, India will have to accentuate that women got us medals in Olympics, Sania wins Double Grand Slam Tennis title again, leading female actors will feature in Baywatch and XXX, and many more such facts. Until then, the shout to promote feminism will continue. Until then, the India I hope for will only be a dream…Yes, even when men have been achieving the same, we will have to glorify the success of the other gender to make the entire nation acknowledge the strength of a woman.

There is no denying the fact that men are physically stronger, but I do not think God intended it to be used as a weapon to exploit women. Do not call us the “weaker sex” based on our physical strength; mentally we are strong beyond men’s understanding (well, men are right when they joke, “We can never understand women” ).. Do pardon me, for ending on a sexist remark!

(Picture from Huffington Post)

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