a curious glance

(little bit of what I see)

Category: General

Get Married Beta, It Is Already Late

What is the right age for marriage? Who gets to decide it? As soon as we turn 25, the wedding bells are supposed to ring for us…. I have no clue who has set this as a standard age for women to get married (and 30 for men).. But if you are one of those who is well past that stage of life and still unmarried, God save you from all the badgering!!! And that too from people who have no right to interfere in your life. Don’t you want to say to these people, “I am pretty sure you are not my family, Who Are You?” I have written a verse answering all those hounding questions, which we generally avoid or give a polite reply to. Only if we could say it on their face!! 😀

Get married beta, it is already late

Well thank you aunty, I’ll rather wait

But what about your biological clock?

It seems only you can hear the tick tock

Why haven’t you found a match yet?

Because you see, I am par excellence

You must be secretly dating the one

Bingo, I will let you know when I elope

Let your parents have some solace

Did they hire you as their advocate?

You should consider it more earnestly

Ain’t you doing that for me already?

But one needs “that” companion

Oh! you mean for sexual relation?

Would you not get married ever?

I am tired of your questions so “clever”

Get married beta, it is already late

Well thank you aunty, I’ll rather wait….

PS: Aunty here represents anyone and everyone who has ever popped these questions at you…

I will re post what I said in my blog, http://acuriousglance.com/dear-future-husband/– “On behalf of the women in their late 20’s or early 30’s who are not married yet, I would like to say, we choose not to succumb to the pressure of society and marry just anyone but would rather wait for “the one”.  Yes, we are independent, want to succeed in our careers but that does not imply we are against the concept of marriage; we just do not want to settle down with the wrong one. If the right one comes our way, we are more than willing to say, “I do”, but if we have not crossed paths yet, give us more time, the world is too big and human lifespan too long.”

The Rule Of Over Generalization

If you are a woman, you would have definitely heard it at least once in your life, “You could spend hours on shopping and never get tired.” If you are a man, you would have heard from your counterpart, “You can watch sports channel the entire day.” Now what is with the rule of generalization, just because many women like shopping, it does not imply all women would and none of the men will? If a man likes to shop, it does not make him less of a man or if a woman is glued to sports channel for hours, it does not give her manly traits.

Why do we generalize everything in our daily routine? If a driver ahead of you steers the car to the left or right suddenly, many of you men sigh, “Must be a woman!” Do not criticize a woman’s driving skills just because you had a bad experience with another one. As if all men are most skilled drivers!? Similarly aren’t you men tired of hearing “Do not involve your male ego in this?” If a single, few or even many men have strong egos, it is not necessary that “all” men do! Why do we take few examples from our life and convert them into a general rule. In statistics terms, it involves the basic error of sampling; the sample is so small that it does not correctly represent the population. Not all men are rapists and not all women are emotional fools.

It is not just the battle of sexes. Such rules have been framed for any aspect possible. Within Delhi, South Delhi people are considered to have an attitude problem. Within India, people in South have the perception that North Indians are snobbish. Outside India, people think Indians can’t speak English or that major parts of the country are filthy. Phew! Generalizations and over generalizations, is it because we judge too quickly?

Remember the movie, My Name Is Khan, and the brilliant dialogue that SRK pulled ardently, “My name is Khan and I am not a terrorist.” That was one strong message. Everything from actions, sexes, regions, countries to religion is generalized. I understand we perceive what is visible around us, but just because it is true for a “small part”, it may not hold valid for “All”. I can only say, let us be less judgmental and more open minded.

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